It's been a fun Christmas, still hints of sadness filtering through as I think about Mum and Dad and what i would have bought them and what they would have said about the various presents that had been exchanged. We've had Mum's Nativity scene up this year and hopefully this will become part of our family Christmas now.
It's Tuesday Bank Holiday the day after Boxing Day and i'm on a bit of a go slow with the cleaning. I'm doing lots of thinking and writing but not much cleaning. I've decided to write down a few things about what i'd like to happen this New Year. A fresh start as they say.
I am hopeful that my Open University course will get completed.
I am hopeful that things with Theo will be better at school, it's been so hard this last few months, knowing that he's reacting to something and not being able to help him. We might hear from the doctor's soon to see if it is partly OCD or something. It's not just him being 'naughty' I don't believe that for one minute.
I am hopeful that I can part company with Socatots in a friendly manner, really hopeful that they will let Matt take the franchise on but losing hope quite quickly as i've had no response to the last email I sent. I really want to just stop doing this now so that I have more time to recoup and rest at the weekend but i'll keep it going for the next couple of months anyway and see how things are.
I need to make more effort to see people and keep in touch with people....especially old friends and family.
I will try and find out what is physically wrong with me and make a concerted effort to feel better.
I will hopefully continue enjoying working at the school.
I hope to see the boys continue to grow into the well behaved, funny, kind, loving boys that they are already.
I also hope that the sadness that is always there following the loss of my Mum will gradually soften and lessen in intensity. Coming up to two years since she has gone and sometimes it only feels like yesterday that she was here and talking to me and hugging me and we were discussing how best to help her in her recovery.
I also hope to be able to resurrect her books and perhaps get them published.
That's a lot to be going on with, but it's doable.....
missing you Mum and Dad....love you both very specially
Ruth xxx
